Assasinating ghosts
Get your conspiracy theory corpse out of my head;
Turned off the thinking and ran away for the afternoon, tucked myself into bed and tried to sleep away this emptiness�
but I found myself staring at your parents across the dinner table with wells in their eyes,
burning holes in my guilty skin like cigarettes put out on ashen flesh�
I tried to smile like I meant it through rotten teeth, tried to cover up this jealousy;
You stood there wasted in your dedication to a cause�
Dedicated to dying like you mean it and leaving me in your absence.
I wish I had your discipline, your passion for punishment,
but I like this satiety too much to die�